Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize