Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
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while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
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did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
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