i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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