Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(845): View more from New York

She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.

Fav 25 5323 1481
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.

Fav 55 2300 8039
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(573): View more from Missouri

So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?

Fav 16 1161 5150
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"

Fav 16 2445 7218
share tweet
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(813): View more from Florida

Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.

Fav 14 1041 4586
share tweet
(732): View more from New Jersey

just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.

Fav 4 3131 990
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(914): View more from New York

I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what

Fav 3 4047 996
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(480): View more from Arizona

I will give you all my nachos to make this happen

Fav 4 1424 769
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(727): View more from Florida

I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?

Fav 3 419 115
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT