Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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