Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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