wat bout pragnant strippers??
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Randomize
