so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
