i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
When are your genitals available?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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