I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
