Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life