thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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