I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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