You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize