Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him