you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
