Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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