I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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