You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'm sobbing to NWA
Randomize