Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize