dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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