Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
