I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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