Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Randomize
