if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize