I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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