what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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