Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
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you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
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Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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