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just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
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