just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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