you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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