Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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