Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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