we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize