Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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