I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
