You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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