why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
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