Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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