what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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