My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
