have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
