What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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