Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
My hand turned me down
just tell him i said nine months
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
