so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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