Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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