holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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