He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize