I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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