gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
