I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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